Is Anxiety Trying to Steal Your Peace? Here's How Therapy Can Help You Take it Back
We've all been there…
Lying awake at night, staring at the ceiling, wondering if the universe is secretly plotting against us. Anxiety can creep into your life like an unwanted guest who just refuses to leave. It's that nagging feeling of "What if?" that keeps you up at night and makes you second-guess everything. While anxiety is a normal response to distressing life events, when it starts to take over your life, it’s time to take action.
The Common Myth About Anxiety
A lot of people believe that anxiety is something you can just "snap out of." If you’ve ever heard someone say, "Just relax! Don’t worry so much," you know how unhelpful that advice can be. Anxiety isn’t a switch that can be turned on and off at will. It’s a complex emotional and physical response that often feels beyond our control. Research has shown that anxiety involves both cognitive and physiological components that can make it particularly difficult to manage without support (Hofmann et al., 2012).
Even though stress and anxiety manifest themselves the same way physiologically in your body, the main difference between stress and anxiety is that when you feel stressed, you know the “reason” why you are stressed (it’s April 14 and you haven’t started your taxes, your loud roommate is blasting music while you’re studying for an exam, or you have an upcoming dentist appointment but you haven’t been flossing). But when you feel anxious, it’s much more difficult to put your finger on the reason “why” you experience that anxiety—and sometimes you might experience both stress and anxiety. The good news is that therapy can help.
Anxiety Doesn't Have to Rule Your Life
Contrary to popular belief, it’s not about eliminating anxiety entirely. Anxiety is actually a natural and protective response—it's there to help you survive. The real challenge is learning how to manage it effectively, so it doesn’t derail your life. Therapy can help you understand the triggers behind your anxiety, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and regain a sense of control.
Whether it's anxiety about a big life change, work stress, or social situations, therapy provides a safe space to explore your feelings. For example, you might uncover that your anxiety is linked to deeper concerns, like self-doubt or a fear of failure. Therapy can help you address those root causes and create a plan to manage your anxiety, not just cope with it.
“Anxiety doesn’t have to rule your life—it can be managed with the right tools and support.”
The Role of Therapy in Managing Anxiety
So, how can therapy actually help? Let’s be real for a second—there’s no magic cure for anxiety. If there were, we’d all be living our best lives without a worry in the world. However, therapy provides tools and strategies to help you feel more empowered. Think of it like learning how to do a tightrope walk: at first, it seems terrifying, but with practice and guidance, you can gain balance and confidence.
In therapy, you’ll learn how to identify and challenge unhelpful thoughts associated with anxiety, breathe through stressful moments, and break out of the cycle of worry. Over time, you’ll be able to reframe your anxiety and use it to make better decisions instead of letting it control you. By addressing these root causes and identifying the triggers, therapy can help you develop healthier ways of thinking, manage your stress, and create a balanced approach to life.
An Interesting Approach (Externalizing) to Relieving the Tension
Have you ever tried talking to your anxiety the way you would to an annoying sibling or friend? "Okay, I hear you, but I’ve got this!" It’s a little quirky, but sometimes putting a name and a face to your anxiety is helpful. This is actually a therapy technique known as “externalizing” (e.g. White & Epston, 1990), where you purposefully perceive your anxiety as a separate force other than of yourself (rather than thinking of it as an inherent part of your identity). In other words, you recognize that the anxiety affects you, but you also recognize it isn’t “who you are.” This approach may help you feel more like you're in control of your anxiety, not the other way around. Anxiety can be persistent, but you can also set boundaries.
In a nutshell
Anxiety is a natural part of life, but when it becomes overwhelming, therapy can help you regain control and develop healthier coping mechanisms. If you're ready to explore your options, reach out today and take the first step toward feeling better.
“Sometimes the best way to handle anxiety is not to eliminate it, but to learn how to coexist with it in a healthier way.”
Reach Out for Help
If you live in California and are looking for therapy near me or therapy for anxiety in California, I’m a licensed marriage and family therapist (with a PhD) who has been practicing since 2010 and specializes in treating anxiety and stress-related issues. I can help you explore the treatment options that work best for you, whether it’s in-person therapy in Redlands, CA, or telehealth sessions from anywhere in California.
Let’s get started with a free 15-minute consultation to discuss your unique situation. No judgment, just a compassionate space for you to take that first step toward feeling better.
References:
Hofmann, S. G., Asnaani, A., Vonk, I. J., Sawyer, A. T., & Fang, A. (2012). The Efficacy of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: A Review of Meta-analyses. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 36(5), 427-440. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10608-012-9476-1
White, M., & Epston, D. (1990). Narrative means to therapeutic ends. Norton & Company.
This blog post was created with the assistance of AI to help with flow and organization.